Plano Christian Counseling, Author at Plano Christian Counseling

10 Steps to Building Self-Esteem

10 Steps to Building Self-Esteem

By Plano Christian Counseling|2024-01-22T14:18:31+00:00January 19th, 2024|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Spiritual Development|

Self-esteem is how you perceive your worth. It is self-respect. If you struggle with low self-esteem, you may have trouble in relationships and social situations. Low self-esteem typically means a lack of assertiveness, which indicates you may need help building self-esteem. 10 Tips for Building Self-Esteem Building self-esteem is simpler than you may think. It is not easy; however, taking specific action can simplify boosting self-esteem. Here are ten steps to building self-esteem. Accept where and who you are now. There is much unhappiness in trying to return to being the version of yourself you used to be. The version you were before the loss of a family member, the end of a marriage, the birth of a child, or the move to a new state. Accepting who you are now and where you are regarding a specific life category grounds you. This acceptance provides clarity for what you want next. Catch negative thoughts. Negative thoughts and demeaning self-talk can do a great deal of damage. Vow to catch these thoughts as soon as you recognize them. Recognize the lie and look for the truth. You can change an old belief into a new one with practice. Flip these thoughts into positive self-talk. Smile. A quick tip for building self-esteem is to smile. Smiling stimulates the amygdala, releasing endorphins that brighten your mood and boost confidence. Notice how others perceive you when you greet them with a smile. You can experience a mood boost by simply smiling when you are alone. Play music. Energetic music, the kind that makes you want to dance, can boost your mood and improve your self-esteem. A song can make you feel like you can take on the world. Create a new playlist with songs that make you feel confident and strong. Be nice [...]

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Nervous Breakdown: What it Is and What to Do

Nervous Breakdown: What it Is and What to Do

By Plano Christian Counseling|2023-12-22T15:55:23+00:00December 22nd, 2023|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling|

The term nervous breakdown refers to your brain’s response to intense, unmanageable emotional distress that leaves you struggling or unable to function in your day-to-day life. It is not a medical term or an official diagnosis of a particular mental health disorder, but rather a colloquialism used to describe a temporary mental health crisis that can be frightening and immobilizing. Symptoms of a nervous breakdown. Unmanageable anxiety. Feeling vulnerable and isolated. Cancelling activities you usually enjoy. Calling in sick for work. Skipping appointments. Isolating from friends and family. Feeling overwhelmed and out of control. Feeling physically paralyzed. Difficulty performing tasks that are usually easy. Brain fog. Trouble remembering things. Trouble focusing or thinking straight. Inability to make decisions. Moodiness. Feeling depressed, burned out, fearful, helpless, or hopeless. Emotional outbursts of anger or uncontrollable crying. Inability to eat or sleep properly. Using sleep as an escape. Neglecting personal hygiene. Feeling detached or delusional. Hallucinations and paranoia. Physical symptoms such as heart palpitations, chest pain, headaches, trouble breathing, dizziness, or nausea. Panic attacks. Thoughts of suicide or self-harm. Possible causes. Taking on too many responsibilities. Too much pressure at work. Being a poor fit for a particular job. Needing to always be in control. Working long hours. Not getting enough sleep. Medical trauma. Family or financial stress. Major life change. Lack of close relationships or social support. Life circumstances that feel too much to handle. Lack of resiliency. Poor coping skills. Treatment options. The most effective treatment for a nervous breakdown is a combination of counseling and the following recommended lifestyle changes. Get adequate rest. Mental exhaustion is often at the core of a nervous breakdown. Maintaining a healthy sleep schedule and getting sufficient rest is key to recuperation. Exercise. Exercise can provide time out from the pressures of your day. [...]

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4 Ways to Experience Effective Coaching

4 Ways to Experience Effective Coaching

By Plano Christian Counseling|2023-11-29T18:44:37+00:00November 29th, 2023|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Professional Development, Spiritual Development|

You know that you want to improve certain aspects of your life, be it career or personal. You've researched coaches and found one that seems to be the right fit. Now you want to get the most out of your time together. How can you make sure you have an effective coaching experience? Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord. – Colossians 3:23, NIV 4 Tips for an Effective Coaching Experience 1. Have definable goals. You may go into your coaching sessions with some big goals, and maybe even some specific goals, early in your time with a coach you want to make clear, definable goals for your time together and apart. Effective coaching will help you determine the best sequence of dreams and make smaller milestones toward the big goal you are trying to achieve. Start by doing what’s necessary; then do what’s possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible. – St. Francis of Assisi 2. Set deadlines or milestones. These could be private and rather arbitrary, but by setting a deadline you create the pressure you need to achieve the results you want. The deadlines can be milestones or stepping stones. Examples include: “By the end of the week, I will…” or “In three months I need to finish…” Finding an approach that works for you can help you maximize the effectiveness of your coaching experience. Have a plan to celebrate those milestones. Maybe you watch a TV show after you accomplish your goal for the week. Perhaps you plan a coffee date with a friend after a certain deadline. Deadlines can be used to reward as well as drive you toward your goals. “Remember to celebrate milestones as you prepare for the road ahead.” – Nelson Mandela [...]

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Preventing Codependency in Marriage

Preventing Codependency in Marriage

By Plano Christian Counseling|2023-11-17T15:24:07+00:00November 17th, 2023|Codependency, Couples Counseling, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

A healthy and balanced marriage relationship may be the goal, but it isn’t always easy. One way you can create and maintain a healthy relationship is by preventing codependency in marriage. By working with your spouse, you can develop a healthy love and care for one another while maintaining the unique characteristics God gave you. Avoiding codependency will help ensure that each person’s feelings are respected, and their needs are met. Healthy marriage tips to avoid codependency in marriage. As you strive for a healthy marriage, you can implement the strategies below. It will help you and your partner foster independence and maintain individual identities as you nurture your marriage. Communication is key. Strive to have open and honest communication with your partner. Prioritize discussing your feelings, needs, and concerns regularly. As you do this be sure that both partners feel heard and understood. Set and respect boundaries. Boundaries are part of healthy relationships. Seek to establish clear, loving boundaries in your relationship. As you recognize that each person has their own needs and feelings, you make each person feel respected and loved. When this happens, you can build a stronger relationship. Prioritize self-care. Self-care benefits both people in a marriage. Encourage one another to engage in self-care activities that promote physical, emotional, and mental well-being. This helps both people function well, enabling them to love one another better. Maintain individual interests and friendships. Everyone has their own passions and interests. Make time and space for pursuing these. Even friendships and social connections outside of your marriage are good for you. Communicate well about it and avoid keeping secrets from one another to foster a healthy relationship as you do this. Try to seek balance. Create a comfortable balance between time spent together and time spent apart. This allows [...]

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Understanding Attachment Issues: 4 Attachment Styles

Understanding Attachment Issues: 4 Attachment Styles

By Plano Christian Counseling|2024-04-04T11:08:09+00:00November 15th, 2023|Abandonment and Neglect, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

The concept of “attachment issues” has become a bit of a buzzword, with a distinct lack of clarity around what it means and how it plays out in practice. The picture that comes to mind is of someone who has trouble maintaining healthy adult relationships, who is overly clingy, or behaves in a toxic way. Understanding Attachment Issues Understanding attachment issues requires getting to grips with attachment theory and attachment styles, which relate to how a person experienced attachment as a child. Four attachment styles. The attachment theory which was pioneered by John Bowlby in 1946 defined attachment as a “lasting psychological connectedness between human beings”. His work focused on babies who had either strong or weak emotional connections with their mothers. The four main types of attachment, which can apply in childhood through adulthood, include: 1. Secure attachment. If a baby trusted their primary caregiver and formed a close, healthy bond with them in their early years, this caregiver gave the infant a secure base from which to explore the world. This is the best possible situation because it hardwires the individual’s brain to feel valued and accepted by other people, and they in turn value and accept other people. In adulthood, people who experienced a secure attachment will likely function well in relationships, trusting people (who merit trust), and being able to regulate their emotions apart from others. 2. Anxious-preoccupied. If a mother or other primary caregiver was inconsistent or slow in responding to an infant’s needs or failed to meet them in some way, a child may demonstrate an anxious-preoccupied attachment style. This can lead to attachment issues in adulthood, with the person generally experiencing a negative view of themselves in relation to others. This means that in relationships, they crave intimacy and want to feel [...]

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Your Financial Future as a Couple

Your Financial Future as a Couple

By Plano Christian Counseling|2023-11-09T08:47:30+00:00November 2nd, 2023|Couples Counseling, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Finances are a big part of life for everyone. In individuals, finances can be a complex issue. Add another person into the mix, and finances can get even more challenging. When you are part of a couple, talking about your financial future may feel uncomfortable. It is, however, an essential part of the health and future of your relationship. Honest, open communication is the key to a stronger relationship. Especially when it comes to finances. It may be difficult to talk about finances with your partner. This can be for a variety of reasons such as different ways of doing things, shame for past decisions, and unhealthy models for finances growing up. These things do not need to prevent you from having these important conversations. A counselor can guide you and your partner through conversations to help you communicate. As a neutral third party, the counselor can ask questions, lead conversations, help people see other perspectives, and offer strategies for better communication. This is incredibly helpful as two people try to build a firm financial future together. No matter what point you are at in your relationship, you can benefit from finding common ground with your partner regarding finances. Finances and new couples. Finances may not seem like a big deal at the beginning of a relationship. You do not need to discuss your financial information with someone you are getting to know. Early discussions about money may revolve around things like who pays for meals and going out or what kind of things work with your budget. Being honest about this early on is helpful as you get to know one another better and spend more time together. Finances and established couples. If you have been dating for a good amount of time and you both consider your [...]

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Overeating Disorder Recovery

Overeating Disorder Recovery

By Plano Christian Counseling|2023-10-28T10:04:12+00:00August 26th, 2023|Eating Disorders, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Eating disorders, like anorexia nervosa, bulimia, and binge eating disorder (overeating disorder) can be fatal without treatment. Recovery from overeating disorder and other eating disorders is possible. Tips for Overeating Disorder Recovery Seek professional help. Overeating disorder can coexist with anxiety and mood disorders. You may struggle with poor body image, negative self-worth, and low self-esteem. The compulsive behavior tricks you into believing you lack self-control and are helpless. This is not true. The first step is to seek professional help. One option is to contact our office at Plano Christian Counseling to schedule an appointment with a license counselor. Stay away from the scale. We can become obsessed with the numbers on the scale. If you struggle with body dysmorphia, poor body image, or low self-esteem, you may need to avoid the scale until you are well into recovery. The number on the scale is simply a number that relates to gravitational pull. It does not consider how much muscle you gain in your workouts, fluid retention, or any other factor. If you are a woman, your weight may fluctuate throughout your cycle, weighing more on the days leading up to your period and during the week of ovulation. Consider using a tape measure to track the lost inches and smaller clothing sizes instead of the scale. Identify negative self-talk. How do you talk to yourself? Are your words worse than you would say to others? We are often harder on ourselves than we are on others. Critical and negative self-talk belittles your motivation and self-esteem. The negative thoughts you hear may be echoes from words spoken over you in the past. You need to learn to let those words go. A counselor can help you identify and reframe those thoughts. Work on getting healthier. Although it is [...]

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Seen by the Savior: Overcoming Loneliness and the Wound of Rejection

Seen by the Savior: Overcoming Loneliness and the Wound of Rejection

By Plano Christian Counseling|2023-10-28T10:04:51+00:00August 15th, 2023|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Spiritual Development|

At times, the world can appear as a warm, lively place, brimming with possibility. At other times, it seems cold and full of loneliness. Jesus was fully aware of these contradictions and complexities in the world He entered as well as the one in which we currently live. As the stairway between God and humans, He came to redeem the lost connection (John 1:51). While it seems that many would embrace His gift of sacrifice and salvation, others rejected Him. In a matter of days, those who cheered Him, shouting Hosanna, countered their initial cries, insisting on His crucifixion (Mark 11:9-10; 15:13-14). The pain of rejection is real, and it can produce a feeling of “otherness,” a loneliness that the APA characterizes as affective and cognitive discomfort or uneasiness from being or perceiving oneself to be alone or otherwise solitary. Yet, this jumbled assortment of experience and emotion doesn’t cancel us out of the books that are written about us in Heaven (Psalm 56:8). As the Everlasting Father, God committed to developing us into all He envisioned us to be. The challenge is we may have discounted ourselves because we agreed with those who rejected us. If rejection’s message of disapproval, denial of attention, and love influenced us in childhood or vulnerable times, we may have come to believe that those negative words were true. Jesus knows the range of conflicts we experience in our emotions as He was fully God and human during the time of His earthly ministry. Scripture describes Him as well-acquainted with sorrows and grief, to the degree that people hid their faces from Him (Isaiah 53:3). The prophet Isaiah’s description of the Messiah sounds like someone we can identify with when it comes to rejection and the loneliness that may play a role in [...]

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Counseling for Children: 5 Principles to Bear in Mind

Counseling for Children: 5 Principles to Bear in Mind

By Plano Christian Counseling|2023-10-28T10:06:16+00:00July 8th, 2023|Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured|

There are many reasons why a family might want to make use of counseling for children. A child may have experienced a traumatic event, such as death or divorce in the family; or been a victim of abuse or bullying. Other less serious circumstances can be perceived as traumatic for a child, for example, a move to a new school or another unexpected change. While children may be less equipped to verbalize their feelings than adults, it is important to bear in mind that counseling for children is not all that different from counseling adults. Children are people created in God’s image and sinners in a fallen world. The struggles and desires they face are not unique to those experienced by all people, and their only hope – as with adults – is the hope presented in Jesus Christ. This reality is encouraging when considering biblical counseling for children which can sometimes be deemed inappropriate or inaccessible for younger counselees. The following five principles are good to bear in mind. Involving parents in counseling for children is a priority. Where possible, it is important for parents as the primary caregivers of their children to be involved in the counseling process. In some circumstances, this might not be suitable. For example, if there is an incidence of abuse by a parent or if the relationship between parent and child is strained. It might be that the parents are immature in their faith. But if they are open to bringing their child to a Christian counselor, then it is a great opportunity for the whole family to be exposed to the redeeming power of God’s Word. Children can grasp wisdom from God’s Word. The Bible is accessible to every person, regardless of their education level or intellect, provided that they can [...]

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Resolving Conflict in the Workplace

Resolving Conflict in the Workplace

By Plano Christian Counseling|2023-10-28T09:59:25+00:00June 16th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Professional Development, Relationship Issues|

The workplace has become a major area of life in the past few decades. Because there is so much time spent at work there will inevitably be conflict in the workplace. Any type of conflict can reduce the workflow and decrease the positive atmosphere. Everyone must know how to resolve conflicts. This will create a healthy work atmosphere for everyone. A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger. – Proverbs 15:1, NASB No matter how big or type of business there will be conflict because there are people present. These conflicts do not have to disrupt the workday. The ability to meet the conflict head-on with resolution will also keep the employees from facing burnout. The best way to resolve conflict is to have leadership that can recognize and address conflict. Three conflicts and resolutions Since many personalities are working together, the most common conflict in the workplace that occurs revolves around how people interact with people. Some conflicts occur that are more personal. No matter the cause there are ways to successfully resolve any type of conflict. Leadership conflict. This is one of the most common types of conflict. Every manager or leader has an idea about productively leading a team. This idea is not always the same for everyone. When there is a decision that causes conflict within the team, the leader must be able to identify and resolve the issue. Here are a few types of conflicts in this area: Decision-making: These conflicts occur when leaders of different areas disagree on a decision. Goals: A manager who has a goal that doesn’t align with the company may cause a conflict within the company and department. Roles: If a manager isn’t clear about their responsibilities it can lead to confusion within the [...]

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