Ashlynn Barnette, Plano Christian Counseling

About Ashlynn Barnette

I offer compassionate Christian counseling for teens and adult individuals facing a variety of challenges including anxiety, depression, trauma, grief, and more. I would be honored to come alongside you, listen to your story, and seek to understand your world as we determine the best treatment plan for your needs. As your advocate, I will walk with you through whatever you may be facing and strive to show you Christ’s love along the way. I believe the counseling process is collaborative and look forward to working with you to achieve your goals.

What is EMDR Therapy?

What is EMDR Therapy?

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2025-05-27T06:56:37+00:00May 27th, 2025|Featured, Individual Counseling, Trauma|

Trauma affects people differently. Some people are affected in such a way that they need extensive treatment for their mental health issues. Traumatic situations can create memories that cause people to have a variety of mental issues, such as PTSD. One type of therapy that is becoming more widely used is eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy, or EMDR. If you’re wondering, “What is EMDR therapy?” this article is for you. This method of therapy for trauma revolves around eye movements as you process memories of traumatic experiences. The main goal of this treatment is to help you heal from those experiences and move toward better mental health. The most helpful aspect of EMDR is that it is based on the body rather than just talking about the problem. This can be helpful for those who are affected by PTSD, panic disorders, depression, and anxiety. How does EMDR help with PTSD? To understand how EMDR can help PTSD, you need to understand what PTSD is and how it affects people. PTSD is one of the most common mental health issues related to trauma. There are thousands of people who deal with post-traumatic stress disorder each day. PTSD was at one time associated with combat veterans but has been expanded to include those who have experienced a serious event such as rape, terrorist act, sex trafficking, natural disaster, or serious accident and injury. Those who suffer from PTSD usually show signs of having flashbacks and may seem detached from people. They do not want to be around any situation or person that may remind them of the traumatic event. To overcome these feelings and behaviors, those with PTSD may engage in therapy with a counselor who is trained to understand PTSD and its effects. In addition to these therapies, medication [...]

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The Link Between Abandonment Trauma and Vulnerability

The Link Between Abandonment Trauma and Vulnerability

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2025-05-20T09:35:44+00:00May 20th, 2025|Abandonment and Neglect, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Trauma|

Most of us have one or two close friends to whom we can open up, even though we might default to bottling things up and dealing with struggles alone. Vulnerability is a risk that requires us to trust someone else with personal information, not unlike an animal exposing its belly to potential predators. We might not have realized it, but there is often a link between our struggles with letting our guard down and abandonment trauma. As tricky as vulnerability can be, it is a skill that we can learn and practice. However, we might have to confront the abandonment trauma we have experienced before we can learn to trust others. The Lonely Child The first person we learn to trust in life is the parent we are closest to. We tell them about our day at school and the things we learned, and we ask them questions about the world around us. Their openness and availability provide a safe place in which we can learn, grow, and feel valued. However, not every child has this kind of bond with an adult. Others experience moments of closeness and intimacy with their parents, followed by times when they are distant and closed off. Some children learn to be self-reliant at a young age. This is a survival tactic; they are learning to cope with the trauma that comes from neglect or abandonment. A parent might be physically present in their child’s life, performing all the tasks that a parent should, but emotionally distant from them. When a parent fails to show concern and interest in their children’s lives, their kids will learn that their experiences, fears, preferences, and accomplishments are meaningless. Some children appear to be resilient on the outside, while on the inside, they are lonely and scared, always [...]

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How to Begin Dealing with Abandonment Wounds

How to Begin Dealing with Abandonment Wounds

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2025-04-23T08:07:00+00:00April 22nd, 2025|Abandonment and Neglect, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Abandonment wounds are difficult to deal with because we often don’t realize we have them. We sustain these wounds from childhood, and they remain with us as adults. They affect many different parts of our lives and relationships, shaping the way we feel about ourselves and the things we believe about others. It is possible to identify where our abandonment wound is and how it’s affecting us. As we begin to confront our beliefs and behaviors connected to our wounds, we will find ways to overcome them and free ourselves from fear and mistrust. Where It All Begins Sometimes, it helps to relive our past and talk about our childhood experiences. Certain events that we go through as children leave us feeling unsafe and uncertain. Adults, and our parents especially, are supposed to make us feel seen, heard, understood, and safe, but sadly, not every parent manages to do this. There could be many ways that we felt neglected, abandoned, or even betrayed by our parents, whether they were aware of their behavior or not. Plano Christian Counseling offers compassionate, faith-based support to help individuals process childhood wounds and move toward healing and restoration. The relationships we have with our parents in childhood affect the connections we make as adults. If we feel unsafe and uncertain as children, the chances are we are going to struggle with trusting others in our adult friendships and relationships. If we were left yearning for a stronger bond with our parents or wished they had been more constant in their care of us, we might be clingy and insecure in our adult connections. We might never have framed our parents’ actions as neglectful or damaging, but we still find ourselves triggered by certain things as adults. Sometimes, these triggers are small, like an [...]

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Self-Forgiveness: Learning How to Forgive Yourself and Why It’s Important

Self-Forgiveness: Learning How to Forgive Yourself and Why It’s Important

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2025-03-22T06:01:59+00:00February 25th, 2025|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Spiritual Development|

Ever find it hard to forgive yourself? Or asked how to forgive yourself? You are not alone. Forgiveness itself can be a difficult task. Even the band Chicago devoted a whole song about it Hard To Say I’m Sorry. Self-forgiveness can seem impossible and hopeless but when achieved it produces healing and freedom. The inability to forgive yourself can cause some significant issues. Shame Shame is the reason why forgiving yourself can seem impossible. Behind shame is a negative core belief of “I am bad.” A negative core belief is something that we believe to be true but is not. Walking around with this belief can lead to feelings of insecurity and behaviors that go along with it. Plano Christian Counseling can help you break free from shame, embrace self-forgiveness, and find healing through faith-based support. It can be difficult to recognize when shame is tainting your view, but damaging, nonetheless. Shame says “You don’t deserve forgiveness.” or “You are not worthy of forgiveness.” These thoughts from shame can cause you to feel stuck. Imagine shame as a dark prison cell – dark because shame festers and grows in darkness. Darkness allows for secrecy so others will not learn the lie that shame has told you (“You are bad.”) Shame festers in this darkness by convincing you “Oh if he/she only knew…” which causes you to feel isolated. The prison cell bars are the lies shame tells you that keep you locked in. Walking aimlessly, desperately searching for a way out of pitch-black darkness. So how can you overcome shame and free yourself from the dark prison cell? First, we need some light. Humbly ask the Light of the World, Jesus, into your cell (1 John 1:5). Don’t feel hesitant, because the truth is He already knows. Ask Him [...]

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Ashlynn Barnette

About Ashlynn Barnette

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