Kate Motaung, Plano Christian Counseling

Bipolar in Teens: How to Know The Signs

Bipolar in Teens: How to Know The Signs

Sarah Harris, Kate Motaung2025-06-13T06:53:02+00:00June 13th, 2025|Bipolar Disorder, Christian Counseling For Teens, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Does your teen have dramatic mood swings that cycle between periods of extreme highs and periods of extreme lows? Are they causing noticeable changes in the way they normally think or act? It could be a sign of bipolar disorder. Bipolar in Teens Bipolar disorder, formerly known as manic depression, is a mental illness that causes extreme shifts in mood, energy level, and behavior. It is characterized by manic episodes during which your teen seems happier than usual, is extremely energetic, and needs little sleep. Those contrast with episodes of depression in which your teen feels sad, apathetic, and fatigued. These episodes may last for one to two weeks or longer, interfere with your teen’s ability to perform daily tasks and disrupt his or her quality of life. Bipolar disorder can appear at any age, but most commonly develops during adolescence. Often it remains undiagnosed because the fluctuating moods are attributed to the normal ups and downs associated with teenage hormones. Early Warning Signs of Bipolar Disorder in Teens Following are some red flags that should not be ignored. If you recognize several of these changes in your teen’s usual mood and behavior, it is important to follow up with a licensed mental health professional experienced in treating bipolar in teens. Bipolar in teens is highly treatable and manageable. The earlier the intervention starts, the better the outcome will be. Common signs of a manic episode. During a manic episode, your teen may feel wired and euphoric and have an inflated sense of self-esteem, grandiosity, and power. Feeling invincible, your teen might exhibit poor judgment, act impulsively, and engage in risky behaviors. Likewise, they may experience racing thoughts and trouble concentrating, talk fast, or jump from topic to unrelated topic. You may notice that your child is more irritable than [...]

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The Many Ways Distorted Thinking Affects Your Life Every Day

The Many Ways Distorted Thinking Affects Your Life Every Day

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2025-06-12T10:05:21+00:00June 12th, 2025|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development|

Emotions are a big part of how you experience your life. They shape the way you see the world, make decisions, and react to the ups and downs of life. But what can happen is that emotions take charge and trick you into thinking things that aren’t true. If you let them, they can twist your thoughts, making situations seem worse than they are. This is called distorted thinking, and it probably happens to you more than you’d think. Distorted emotions are like a filter, and through it, everything seems darker and more difficult than it really is. You can have a small argument with a friend, and then an emotional response will make you think, “They don’t care about me,” even when there’s no proof. These kinds of thoughts feel real at the moment, but they’re not the truth; they’re just emotions blurring reality. With some awareness of how your brain may conjure up this wrong way of thinking, it’s possible to spot these patterns, and then you can change them. Why do you have emotions? Emotions come from a part of your brain called the amygdala. It’s the one that helps you respond to things around you. These emotional responses are part of what keeps you safe and balanced. The amygdala normally processes feelings like fear and anger, where chemicals such as dopamine and serotonin create sensations of either happiness or sadness. These emotions are the brain’s way of helping us respond quickly to the world around us. This is the way your brain knows, for example, that fear signals danger, and joy means something good is around. Through it all, the brain is supposed to remain in charge of your thoughts by rationalizing and balancing your reactions with what is real. Everyone experiences emotional highs and [...]

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Christian Couples Counseling to Help You Nurture a Healthy Relationship

Christian Couples Counseling to Help You Nurture a Healthy Relationship

Bryan Ferguson, Kate Motaung2025-06-06T07:09:03+00:00June 6th, 2025|Couples Counseling, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Premarital Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Your relationships form one of the most important aspects of your life. The people in your life who matter most are usually the ones who are with you through the various seasons and experiences that have shaped who you are. Sharing life with others helps you to build bonds that enrich your life, and provides emotional support in times of need. These relationships are the stuff of life, and they are vital for your well-being. Healthy relationships will often have the largest impact on your flourishing. Relationships that are nurturing, open, committed, respectful, filled with compassion and kindness, are healthy and stimulate your well-being. However, relationships that are mired in conflict, are unreliable, uncomfortable, or have poor communication, can damage your well-being. All of this is even more true in a romantic relationship. The intimacy and weight that romantic relationships carry mean that when things go wrong, it is often more impactful than in other relationships. There’s a difference, however subtle, between a close friend hurting you, and your spouse hurting you. The closer the relationship, the deeper the hurt that can be inflicted. Couples can learn how to nurture their relationship through couples counseling. Challenges that Couples Face Even the happiest and most well-adjusted couples face challenges of all kinds. Some issues that a couple faces come from outside the relationship, but other issues are the result of the couple’s limitations and unhelpful patterns of behavior and thought. A given couple can face challenges relating to various aspects such as their life stage, issues with communication, or external pressures like financial problems. It may be helpful to detail some of the common issues that couples face. Recognizing that other couples have struggles similar to your own can help remove the sense of isolation and possibly stigma that you [...]

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Common ADHD Quirks and How to Manage Them

Common ADHD Quirks and How to Manage Them

McCartney Paul, Kate Motaung2025-06-05T07:08:08+00:00June 5th, 2025|ADHD/ADD, Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Having ADHD is a mixed bag of fun and frustration. so many things are just different about us compared to neurotypical folks, that it’s sometimes hard to keep track of. It is important for us to feel seen and understood because, although we might be different, there is nothing inherently wrong with us. As with everyone, regardless of their neurotype, sometimes we need to understand why we are doing certain things so that we can better adapt or tweak our actions, for the good of everyone. Let’s explore some of the most common ADHD quirks and consider how to manage them. Common ADHD Quirks and How to Manage Them Most of us have poor bladder control When we get locked into a hyperfocus mode, there is little that can stop us or distract us, even a full bladder. Unfortunately, holding urine does not strengthen the bladder but weakens it over time. It might take a lot of practice, but we simply need to lean into our natural affinity for multitasking and go to the bathroom while we are doing whatever fun task we are absorbed in. We tend to adopt accents Those with ADHD often become fascinated by ordinary things, and a foreign accent can be captivating. We tend to imitate accents without even realizing it, and sometimes this comes across as rude or fake, although for us it is harmless and unintentional. If we find ourselves in a conversation with someone who has an interesting accent, it might be helpful to warn them that we tend to mimic accents. It may not be a big deal, but it also might be best to warn others before it slips out. Alternatively, we can be self-aware and try to intentionally stop ourselves from mimicking. We suffer from FOMO There is [...]

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Ways to Deal with Emotional Abuse in a Relationship

Ways to Deal with Emotional Abuse in a Relationship

Sarah Harris, Kate Motaung2025-06-03T06:38:24+00:00June 3rd, 2025|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Trauma|

If you take a walk in a park, soak in your surroundings in a coffee shop, or look around you as you sit in the vibrant heart of your city, you may have the privilege of witnessing the magic of great relationships. It’s amazing when you see two people whose eyes are alive with joy in each other, oozing genuine affection for each other as they share stories or sit in an easy silence with each other. When a relationship is thriving, it can lift you to amazing heights, helping you to flourish. On the other hand, an unhealthy relationship can cast a pall over a person’s life. You can see a radiant person slowly begin to dull because of a toxic relationship. A healthy relationship can be a great joy, but an unhealthy one can make it feel as though the world itself is crumbling beneath your feet. One way for a relationship to be unhealthy is when it is emotionally abusive. What makes a relationship emotionally abusive? There are different ways to hurt a person. People are creatures made in the image of the eternal and majestic God, and He loves them deeply (Genesis 1:26-28; John 3:16). For many reasons, people deserve to be treated with respect, kindness, and compassion. When they are treated in ways that cause them harm and detract from the fullness and flourishing God intends for His creation, that treatment is abusive. In a relationship, emotional abuse consists of a pattern of behavior where one partner relates to the other in ways that diminish their well-being and sense of self. This often occurs through attempts to diminish, control, manipulate, and dominate the other, often through non-physical means. Emotional abuse leverages words, attitudes, and tone to damage another person. Ultimately, what makes a relationship [...]

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4 Indications That You Have Abandonment Anxiety

4 Indications That You Have Abandonment Anxiety

Tammy Varghese, Kate Motaung2025-05-30T08:47:17+00:00May 30th, 2025|Abandonment and Neglect, Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling|

It’s not always easy to know when you have abandonment anxiety. There are occasions when people face physical trauma and walk away from it feeling fine, only to discover they have obtained a hairline fracture in one of their bones. Abandonment anxiety is similar in that. You might have felt as if you sustained no emotional damage from a traumatic event in your past, only to experience strange twinges of pain and annoyance from unexpected events later in life. Abandonment trauma tends to lie dormant in your heart and only becomes apparent when you get emotionally close to someone. Then, you are suddenly afraid of damaging the relationship irreparably or doing something that will cause them to walk out on you. It’s not always easy to identify abandonment anxiety, and even more challenging to know what to do with it once you’ve recognized it. You are not alone in this experience, but you might have to risk becoming vulnerable so that you can address these issues and experience authentic, secure intimacy with your loved ones. Indicators of Abandonment Anxiety You struggle with unresolved conflict It’s not unusual to struggle with conflict. However, some people feel crippled when fights are left unresolved. If a disagreement with a loved one has been left without a conclusion, you might find yourself keeping your distance from them, wracked by nerves when you are around them, and unable to focus on anything until some resolution is reached. These levels of anxiety over conflict would be considered extreme, and they likely point to a person dealing with abandonment trauma. At the core of abandonment trauma is a fear of being left behind, forgotten, overlooked, or dismissed. When you are in the middle of a fight that has not been resolved, you are out of control [...]

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What is EMDR Therapy?

What is EMDR Therapy?

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2025-05-27T06:56:37+00:00May 27th, 2025|Featured, Individual Counseling, Trauma|

Trauma affects people differently. Some people are affected in such a way that they need extensive treatment for their mental health issues. Traumatic situations can create memories that cause people to have a variety of mental issues, such as PTSD. One type of therapy that is becoming more widely used is eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy, or EMDR. If you’re wondering, “What is EMDR therapy?” this article is for you. This method of therapy for trauma revolves around eye movements as you process memories of traumatic experiences. The main goal of this treatment is to help you heal from those experiences and move toward better mental health. The most helpful aspect of EMDR is that it is based on the body rather than just talking about the problem. This can be helpful for those who are affected by PTSD, panic disorders, depression, and anxiety. How does EMDR help with PTSD? To understand how EMDR can help PTSD, you need to understand what PTSD is and how it affects people. PTSD is one of the most common mental health issues related to trauma. There are thousands of people who deal with post-traumatic stress disorder each day. PTSD was at one time associated with combat veterans but has been expanded to include those who have experienced a serious event such as rape, terrorist act, sex trafficking, natural disaster, or serious accident and injury. Those who suffer from PTSD usually show signs of having flashbacks and may seem detached from people. They do not want to be around any situation or person that may remind them of the traumatic event. To overcome these feelings and behaviors, those with PTSD may engage in therapy with a counselor who is trained to understand PTSD and its effects. In addition to these therapies, medication [...]

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5 Relationship Types and How to Strengthen Your Bonds

5 Relationship Types and How to Strengthen Your Bonds

McCartney Paul, Kate Motaung2025-05-22T07:13:04+00:00May 22nd, 2025|Couples Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Relationships are a part of life, but why? If we have learned anything during the pandemic, it has been that although isolation is necessary for particular seasons of our lives, we thrive when we are part of a social circle. This circle can include your spouse, children, parents, siblings, coworkers, or the friendly mail delivery carrier. You choose the people and how much access they have to your life. Knowing the five relationship types and how you can strengthen those bonds can serve you well in every area of life. Why Relationships are Necessary Positive relationships are necessary for the formation of social skills and happiness. Different types of relationships fulfill various needs throughout life and can result in better emotional and mental health. Not feeling alone, even when you are struggling, is crucial to avoiding specific mental condition symptoms such as depression. Relationships, even the hard and toxic ones, help build emotional resilience. Resiliency will help you overcome challenges throughout life and move forward instead of staying “stuck,” reliving hurt, disappointment, or trauma. Relationships provide a support system and other people to share your burdens. When going through something challenging, you want people who love and care about you to help stand in the gap. Relationships allow you to support others and be a blessing when they need it. As relationships form early, those bonds may shape the person you become. But remember, even if your relationships throughout childhood were tumultuous, you have the resources to lead a different life. You can choose to surround yourself with people who can push you to learn more, think differently, and act appropriately. The relationships you choose later in life can either bless you or harm you. Not every relationship needs to be a close, intimate one to benefit you. Building [...]

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Gaslighting in Relationships: Effective Ways to Respond

Gaslighting in Relationships: Effective Ways to Respond

Sarah Harris, Kate Motaung2025-05-21T06:50:10+00:00May 21st, 2025|Couples Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues, Trauma|

Imagine waking up to a world where your reality feels like a mirage, where the truth is foggy and distorted by someone else’s perceptions. This is the haunting reality of gaslighting. Gaslighting in relationships can leave you feeling disoriented, questioning even your reality, and undermining your self-worth. Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which one person tries to make another person doubt their perception of reality, memories, or feelings. The term originates from the play, “Gas Light,” where the husband manipulates his wife into thinking she is losing her sanity by dimming the gas lights and denying it. Gaslighting in relationships often involves tactics such as denying facts, twisting the truth, blaming the victim, and using emotional manipulation. The goal is to gain control over the victim, leading them to feel confused, anxious, and insecure about their own judgment and perceptions. Powerful Strategies to Combat Gaslighting in Relationships During this emotional turmoil, it’s important to respond in ways that are effective. Here are some powerful strategies to combat gaslighting in relationships. Trust your gut Listen to your gut feelings. If something feels off in your relationship, don’t dismiss those feelings. While the world might tell you that you should trust your instincts, as Christians, we know that at times, that still small voice warning you of potential danger may be the Holy Spirit. Journal your truth Start a personal journal dedicated to your thoughts, feelings, and experiences. Document specific incidents where you felt gaslighted, including quotes from the abuser and your reactions. This practice can serve as a concrete reminder of your reality and help you reclaim your narrative. Be sure to store your journal in a secure place, out of the hands of your abuser. Keep evidence If you feel comfortable doing so, gather evidence of [...]

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The Link Between Abandonment Trauma and Vulnerability

The Link Between Abandonment Trauma and Vulnerability

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2025-05-20T09:35:44+00:00May 20th, 2025|Abandonment and Neglect, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Trauma|

Most of us have one or two close friends to whom we can open up, even though we might default to bottling things up and dealing with struggles alone. Vulnerability is a risk that requires us to trust someone else with personal information, not unlike an animal exposing its belly to potential predators. We might not have realized it, but there is often a link between our struggles with letting our guard down and abandonment trauma. As tricky as vulnerability can be, it is a skill that we can learn and practice. However, we might have to confront the abandonment trauma we have experienced before we can learn to trust others. The Lonely Child The first person we learn to trust in life is the parent we are closest to. We tell them about our day at school and the things we learned, and we ask them questions about the world around us. Their openness and availability provide a safe place in which we can learn, grow, and feel valued. However, not every child has this kind of bond with an adult. Others experience moments of closeness and intimacy with their parents, followed by times when they are distant and closed off. Some children learn to be self-reliant at a young age. This is a survival tactic; they are learning to cope with the trauma that comes from neglect or abandonment. A parent might be physically present in their child’s life, performing all the tasks that a parent should, but emotionally distant from them. When a parent fails to show concern and interest in their children’s lives, their kids will learn that their experiences, fears, preferences, and accomplishments are meaningless. Some children appear to be resilient on the outside, while on the inside, they are lonely and scared, always [...]

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