Rhonda Gist, Plano Christian Counseling

4 Signs of Infidelity: How to Detect Them and What Can Be Done

4 Signs of Infidelity: How to Detect Them and What Can Be Done

Rhonda Gist, Kate Motaung2026-05-30T13:00:04+00:00May 20th, 2026|Couples Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Infidelity and Affairs, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Do you feel like you and your spouse have drifted apart? Are you wondering if your spouse is interested in someone else? No matter how long we are married, infidelity is shocking and extremely painful. Knowing the signs of infidelity and understanding how to respond can help you overcome the hurt and restore your marriage. Please note that just because any or all these things might occur, it does not necessarily prove your spouse has been or is being unfaithful. They could just be a warning sign that there is a crack in the foundation of the marriage that needs to be addressed. It’s important to deal with any concerns in an open, loving, and honest manner as soon as possible. Behavioral Changes The first signs of infidelity you might notice are behavioral changes. There may be red flags, such as sudden secrecy with the phone, e-mail, or social media, changing passwords, always keeping the phone face down, or going to the other room to talk on the phone. A new e-mail address or suddenly using a text app or other communication app could indicate your spouse is trying to keep secrets. Other indicators could be changes in routine, such as staying at work late or going on unexplained trips, having new friends who they are not willing to introduce you to, getting involved with a new hobby or activity outside the home, but not including you. Your spouse may start dressing better or paying more attention to appearance, such as working out more, getting a new hairstyle, or purchasing new underwear. They may no longer want to participate in activities that the two of you used to do together. Digital and logistical clues may include things like deleting messages or browsing history, downloading and using new apps, creating [...]

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What is an Anxiety Attack, and What Should I Do if I Have One?

What is an Anxiety Attack, and What Should I Do if I Have One?

Rhonda Gist, Kate Motaung2026-04-29T07:09:01+00:00March 26th, 2026|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling|

What is anxiety? It is a feeling of nervousness, anticipation with uncertainty, or fear. Anxiety often creates a physical response. Common physical symptoms are sweaty palms, butterflies in the stomach, muscle tension, shakiness, increased heart rate, and sometimes increased breathing rate. The word anxiety comes from the Latin angere, meaning to choke or squeeze. Strangely, this is exactly what can happen in our brains when we feel under threat or danger, whether it is real or imagined. When we are relaxed and calm, more blood goes to the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for functions like self-control and decision-making. However, during an anxiety attack, blood flow is reduced to the prefrontal cortex and increased to the amygdala, resulting in our emotional response being disproportionate to the stimulus. The amygdala is responsible for the detection and response to threats. Fear triggers a distress signal to the hypothalamus, and then adrenocorticotropic hormones are sent to the adrenal glands to release adrenaline and cortisol. This stress response allows for energy to be converted quickly because anxiety often leads to a fight or flight response. However, often there is no need to fight or flee, and we are overwhelmed with anxiety when this energy is just held in the body. Our body is “hijacked,” and physical symptoms occur. Anxiety attacks can be triggered by reminders of past trauma, or they can occur for no apparent reason. The Bible offers comfort and guidance for anxiety as God knew that it is something we would struggle with. Several scriptures specifically address anxiety. I Peter 5:7 reminds us to cast all of our anxieties on Jesus because he cares for us. Philippians 4: 6-7 reminds us not to be anxious about anything, but in everything be in prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let our requests be [...]

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Mindfulness Breathing Exercises to Reduce Stress

Mindfulness Breathing Exercises to Reduce Stress

Rhonda Gist, Kate Motaung2026-03-25T06:19:18+00:00March 25th, 2026|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Professional Development, Spiritual Development|

Stress is part of our daily life and negatively impacts our physical and mental health. Mindfulness breathing is a technique that everyone can learn that reduces the impact of stress. There are many different breathing techniques. "Breathe Deep", Courtesy of Darius Bashar, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; How does mindful breathing help reduce the impact of stress? Breathing is an automatic function that seems simple, and we don’t even have to think about it. However, learning specific breathing exercises, thinking about and managing breathing further expands the benefit of breathing from just keeping us alive to improving our mental and physical health. Mindful breathing can increase the oxygen levels in our brain, lower our blood pressure, improve overall circulation, and calm our nervous system. Our breathing is such a powerful tool for battling stress and anxiety because it connects us to the presence of God. In the Bible, the Greek word “pneuma” is used to signify God’s life-giving power, humanity's mortality, and the Holy Spirit. In Genesis 2:7, it is noted that God formed man and breathed into him the breath of life, and man became a living being. In Job 32:8, it notes there is a spirit in people, the breath of the Almighty within them, that makes them intelligent. Isaiah 42:5 notes that God gives breath to everyone on earth. There are many different breathing exercises, and all are effective, so it’s important to find the one that works best for you or find several in order to keep the variety available for you. Basic Mindful Breathing Get comfortable by sitting or standing and loosening tight clothes. Remove distractions. Turn off the TV and your phone. Close your eyes. Start by just noticing your breath, don’t force it, just be aware of the air coming in and going out [...]

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Emotional Trauma in Relationships: Causes, Impact, and Finding Healing

Emotional Trauma in Relationships: Causes, Impact, and Finding Healing

Rhonda Gist, Kate Motaung2026-05-16T07:40:25+00:00February 27th, 2026|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Trauma|

Different kinds of wounds can be inflicted upon us, and we can inflict wounds upon others. From a young age, we learn that we can get hurt, that our actions have consequences, and that when we get hurt or hurt others, it can take time for healing to happen. Physical wounds are one thing, but emotional trauma is another kind of wound that can cause lasting damage in relationships as well as to a person’s well-being. The playground retort that “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words alone won’t hurt me” is one way to respond to the mean things that someone says to you. Sticks and stones cause visible damage, and so the hurt they cause is obvious. However, it isn’t true that words can’t or don’t hurt. Words absolutely hurt, and even callous actions can leave a lasting negative impression. But what is emotional trauma, and how does it impact you? A Wound Beneath the Surface When someone says that they’ve experienced physical trauma, we know to give them a once-over to locate the hurt and then begin the process of treatment. When someone gets hurt in other ways, like emotionally, how do you even begin to know where to look and how to deal with it? Understanding emotional trauma is an important step that will get us closer to knowing what to look for, as well as understanding how it impacts someone. Emotional trauma can be a deep psychological wound that is caused by an experience that overwhelms your ability to cope. Some wounds happen, but you’re able to take it in stride. A colleague makes a snide remark during a work meeting, but you’re able to keep things moving, shrugging it off. There are other times when certain actions or words overwhelm you, [...]

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Bible Verses About Loss: Encouragement from a Christian Counselor

Bible Verses About Loss: Encouragement from a Christian Counselor

Rhonda Gist, Kate Motaung2026-02-17T07:41:58+00:00February 17th, 2026|Featured, Grief Counseling, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

Often during grief and difficult times in our lives, whether it’s the death of a loved one or another significant loss, we may feel that God has turned his back on us or has let us down in some way; however, the Bible consistently reassures us that God cares for us all the time and is particularly close to us during difficult times. God and Loss God put these verses in the Bible because He knew that we would have these doubts about His presence, so He repeatedly reassures us that He is especially close to us during tough times. The Bible verses regarding loss also consistently remind us that any heartache or pain that we suffer here on earth will be taken away in eternal life. We are encouraged to have a mindset of eternity. While it can be hard for us to grasp the reality of eternity, it serves as a reminder that the grief and heartbreak we experience during our lifetime are a fleeting period compared to eternity. I find it comforting that God understands our shortcomings and struggles and consistently gives us reassurance in the Bible. Bible Verses About Loss in the Psalms Now let’s look at a few of these verses in particular. One of the most frequently recited scriptures is Psalm 34:18, which states, “the Lord draws near to the brokenhearted.” You may wonder how God is closer to us during times when we are brokenhearted since he is always with us. Remembering that God is our father, I like to think of a parent and child. While the parent may always be nearby, when a child is hurt, the parent goes to the child and often will hold them, comfort them, hug them, and say comforting words to ease their pain. I think [...]

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How Self-Compassion Can Help With Depression

How Self-Compassion Can Help With Depression

Rhonda Gist, Kate Motaung2026-04-07T07:45:28+00:00June 26th, 2025|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development|

🎧 Listen to this article https://planochristiancounseling.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Plano-Christian-Counseling-How-Self-Compassion-Can-Help-With-Depression.mp3 Self-compassion means having a positive attitude toward yourself that enables you to get through difficult times in life. Along with this attitude comes the ability to treat yourself with kindness, understanding, and acceptance. Self-compassion includes self-talk and self-care activities, which will be discussed in more detail. When you find yourself feeling more down than usual or even struggling with clinical depression (depressed mood that lasts longer than two weeks and includes other symptoms), what is your internal dialogue? Are you kind and compassionate or critical and neglectful of yourself? Self-talk or internal dialogue is often self-critical, negative, and hurtful. Your internal dialogue likely includes things that you would never say to a friend, especially one who is facing a difficult time or feeling depressed. Do you criticize yourself for being lazy, ungrateful, angry, or irritable? Or is your inner dialogue kind, compassionate, and encouraging to yourself? Even if you tend to be critical and negative, you can choose and intentionally change this narrative, which can help with depression. Please note that self-compassion is not self-pity, as it involves treating yourself with kindness, understanding, and acceptance. Self-compassion is acknowledging your imperfections as a human and recognizing that suffering is a part of the human experience, and having the self-awareness to know that there are things you can do that will help. Self-pity involves indulgence and feeling sorry for yourself without the desire to feel better. It is important to care for yourself during a difficult time with the confidence that you will feel better. It is also believing and trusting that God is with you and will help you. Romans 12:2 says, “Let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think.” It can be difficult to have positive [...]

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Getting Over a Breakup: Taking Time for Yourself

Getting Over a Breakup: Taking Time for Yourself

Rhonda Gist, Kate Motaung2025-06-25T05:38:05+00:00June 25th, 2025|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Getting over a breakup is challenging and often emotionally draining. The length of the relationship and the reasons for the breakup impact the time the healing process may take. However, there is a reframing that might help in this difficult moment of healing. You can look at this time as an opportunity to learn, grow, and start fresh. You can heal while tackling your physical and mental health. Now is the time to prioritize yourself while getting over a breakup. Tips for Getting Over a Breakup Getting over a breakup can be long and grievous, whether in a relationship for a few months or several decades. You were emotionally invested in another person and created dreams for the future. The reasons for the breakup can vary from mutual decision to infidelity, abuse, or sudden absence. After a breakup, you may struggle with feelings of loss, failure, shame, guilt, and uncertainty. This emotional roller coaster is temporary as you heal. However, there are several strategies you can use to help heal after a breakup. It’s okay to grieve If you have been advised by well-meaning friends and family to “just get over it,” you know how frustrating this can be. A breakup is a loss; it is the death of a relationship and a dream for the future. It is okay to take time to grieve. Processing your emotions is critical for your emotional and mental well-being. You were emotionally invested and loved this person. Whether you initiated the breakup or not, the loss is just as profound. Take the time to learn about the grieving process and allow yourself time to heal. Stop all contact Unless you share children with your ex, stop all contact. You can delay healing if you constantly converse or see your ex. If your [...]

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Don’t Tough it Out Alone: Thoughts on Grief Counseling

Don’t Tough it Out Alone: Thoughts on Grief Counseling

Rhonda Gist, Kate Motaung2025-04-23T08:16:27+00:00April 21st, 2025|Featured, Grief Counseling, Individual Counseling|

One of the worst challenges one can face is adjusting to life after the death of someone we love. Even though most of us will experience this at some point in our lives, we are never prepared for it and unfortunately, our society does not generally understand grief and doesn’t have a space for it. You may have heard of the stages of grief, but what does that look like in real life, and is it really that simple? Christian grief counseling can help. Grief is Personal Grief shakes our world and is personal, confusing, exhausting, and may cause you to wonder if you are going crazy, if it will ever end, if you are “doing it right” or if anyone cares. There is no timeline for grief, no formula for how to grieve. There is no right way to grieve, but there is a right way for you, and a counselor can help you with this. You are not crazy. Whatever you are experiencing is normal. Grief may not end but it can get easier. How long will you miss the person you love? You will miss them for the rest of your life, but it will be less painful and become a manageable part of your life. The intensity of your grief will reflect the love of the person. You may feel alone in your grief, but remember that God cares deeply, as Psalm 34:18 (NASB) says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Plano Christian Counseling offers faith-based grief support to walk alongside you as you navigate loss and begin to find hope and healing. Because others around you may also be grieving and your usual support system is weakened or shaken, seeing a counselor to help during [...]

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