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Preventing Codependency in Marriage

Preventing Codependency in Marriage

Jennifer Kooshian2025-04-01T15:37:04+00:00November 17th, 2023|Codependency, Couples Counseling, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

A healthy and balanced marriage relationship may be the goal, but it isn’t always easy. One way you can create and maintain a healthy relationship is by preventing codependency in marriage. By working with your spouse, you can develop a healthy love and care for one another while maintaining the unique characteristics God gave you. Avoiding codependency will help ensure that each person’s feelings are respected, and their needs are met. Healthy marriage tips to avoid codependency in marriage. As you strive for a healthy marriage, you can implement the strategies below. It will help you and your partner foster independence and maintain individual identities as you nurture your marriage. Plano Christian Counseling offers faith-based marriage counseling to help couples navigate challenges, improve communication, and cultivate a Christ-centered relationship. Communication is key. Strive to have open and honest communication with your partner. Prioritize discussing your feelings, needs, and concerns regularly. As you do this be sure that both partners feel heard and understood. Set and respect boundaries. Boundaries are part of healthy relationships. Seek to establish clear, loving boundaries in your relationship. As you recognize that each person has their own needs and feelings, you make each person feel respected and loved. When this happens, you can build a stronger relationship. Prioritize self-care. Self-care benefits both people in a marriage. Encourage one another to engage in self-care activities that promote physical, emotional, and mental well-being. This helps both people function well, enabling them to love one another better. Maintain individual interests and friendships. Everyone has their own passions and interests. Make time and space for pursuing these. Even friendships and social connections outside of your marriage are good for you. Communicate well about it and avoid keeping secrets from one another to foster a healthy relationship as you do [...]

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Understanding Attachment Issues: 4 Attachment Styles

Understanding Attachment Issues: 4 Attachment Styles

Jennifer Kooshian2025-04-01T15:41:31+00:00November 15th, 2023|Abandonment and Neglect, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

The concept of “attachment issues” has become a bit of a buzzword, with a distinct lack of clarity around what it means and how it plays out in practice. The picture that comes to mind is of someone who has trouble maintaining healthy adult relationships, who is overly clingy, or behaves in a toxic way. Plano Christian Counseling offers faith-based counseling to help individuals understand and heal from attachment issues. Understanding Attachment Issues Understanding attachment issues requires getting to grips with attachment theory and attachment styles, which relate to how a person experienced attachment as a child. Four attachment styles. The attachment theory which was pioneered by John Bowlby in 1946 defined attachment as a “lasting psychological connectedness between human beings”. His work focused on babies who had either strong or weak emotional connections with their mothers. The four main types of attachment, which can apply in childhood through adulthood, include: 1. Secure attachment. If a baby trusted their primary caregiver and formed a close, healthy bond with them in their early years, this caregiver gave the infant a secure base from which to explore the world. This is the best possible situation because it hardwires the individual’s brain to feel valued and accepted by other people, and they in turn value and accept other people. In adulthood, people who experienced a secure attachment will likely function well in relationships, trusting people (who merit trust), and being able to regulate their emotions apart from others. 2. Anxious-preoccupied. If a mother or other primary caregiver was inconsistent or slow in responding to an infant’s needs or failed to meet them in some way, a child may demonstrate an anxious-preoccupied attachment style. This can lead to attachment issues in adulthood, with the person generally experiencing a negative view of themselves in [...]

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Your Financial Future as a Couple

Your Financial Future as a Couple

Kate Motaung2025-04-01T15:53:51+00:00November 2nd, 2023|Couples Counseling, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Finances are a big part of life for everyone. In individuals, finances can be a complex issue. Add another person into the mix, and finances can get even more challenging. When you are part of a couple, talking about your financial future may feel uncomfortable. It is, however, an essential part of the health and future of your relationship. Honest, open communication is the key to a stronger relationship. Especially when it comes to finances. It may be difficult to talk about finances with your partner. This can be for a variety of reasons such as different ways of doing things, shame for past decisions, and unhealthy models for finances growing up. These things do not need to prevent you from having these important conversations. A counselor can guide you and your partner through conversations to help you communicate. As a neutral third party, the counselor can ask questions, lead conversations, help people see other perspectives, and offer strategies for better communication. This is incredibly helpful as two people try to build a firm financial future together. Plano Christian Counseling offers faith-based counseling to help couples navigate financial conversations, strengthen their communication, and build a secure future together. No matter what point you are at in your relationship, you can benefit from finding common ground with your partner regarding finances. Finances and new couples. Finances may not seem like a big deal at the beginning of a relationship. You do not need to discuss your financial information with someone you are getting to know. Early discussions about money may revolve around things like who pays for meals and going out or what kind of things work with your budget. Being honest about this early on is helpful as you get to know one another better and spend more time [...]

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Overeating Disorder Recovery

Overeating Disorder Recovery

Melissa Plantz2025-04-01T15:59:23+00:00August 26th, 2023|Eating Disorders, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Eating disorders, like anorexia nervosa, bulimia, and binge eating disorder (overeating disorder) can be fatal without treatment. Recovery from overeating disorder and other eating disorders is possible. Tips for Overeating Disorder Recovery Seek professional help. Overeating disorder can coexist with anxiety and mood disorders. You may struggle with poor body image, negative self-worth, and low self-esteem. The compulsive behavior tricks you into believing you lack self-control and are helpless. This is not true. The first step is to seek professional help. One option is to contact our office at Plano Christian Counseling to schedule an appointment with a license counselor. Stay away from the scale. We can become obsessed with the numbers on the scale. If you struggle with body dysmorphia, poor body image, or low self-esteem, you may need to avoid the scale until you are well into recovery. The number on the scale is simply a number that relates to gravitational pull. It does not consider how much muscle you gain in your workouts, fluid retention, or any other factor. Plano Christian Counseling offers faith-based counseling to help individuals struggling with body image issues, low self-esteem, and related concerns. If you are a woman, your weight may fluctuate throughout your cycle, weighing more on the days leading up to your period and during the week of ovulation. Consider using a tape measure to track the lost inches and smaller clothing sizes instead of the scale. Identify negative self-talk. How do you talk to yourself? Are your words worse than you would say to others? We are often harder on ourselves than we are on others. Critical and negative self-talk belittles your motivation and self-esteem. The negative thoughts you hear may be echoes from words spoken over you in the past. You need to learn to let those [...]

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Seen by the Savior: Overcoming Loneliness and the Wound of Rejection

Seen by the Savior: Overcoming Loneliness and the Wound of Rejection

Kate Motaung2025-04-01T16:04:28+00:00August 15th, 2023|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Spiritual Development|

At times, the world can appear as a warm, lively place, brimming with possibility. At other times, it seems cold and full of loneliness. Jesus was fully aware of these contradictions and complexities in the world He entered as well as the one in which we currently live. As the stairway between God and humans, He came to redeem the lost connection (John 1:51). While it seems that many would embrace His gift of sacrifice and salvation, others rejected Him. In a matter of days, those who cheered Him, shouting Hosanna, countered their initial cries, insisting on His crucifixion (Mark 11:9-10; 15:13-14). The pain of rejection is real, and it can produce a feeling of “otherness,” a loneliness that the APA characterizes as affective and cognitive discomfort or uneasiness from being or perceiving oneself to be alone or otherwise solitary. Yet, this jumbled assortment of experience and emotion doesn’t cancel us out of the books that are written about us in Heaven (Psalm 56:8). As the Everlasting Father, God committed to developing us into all He envisioned us to be. The challenge is we may have discounted ourselves because we agreed with those who rejected us. If rejection’s message of disapproval, denial of attention, and love influenced us in childhood or vulnerable times, we may have come to believe that those negative words were true. Plano Christian Counseling offers faith-based counseling to help you heal from the wounds of rejection and build a healthy, Christ-centered self-image. Jesus knows the range of conflicts we experience in our emotions as He was fully God and human during the time of His earthly ministry. Scripture describes Him as well-acquainted with sorrows and grief, to the degree that people hid their faces from Him (Isaiah 53:3). The prophet Isaiah’s description of the Messiah [...]

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Counseling for Children: 5 Principles to Bear in Mind

Counseling for Children: 5 Principles to Bear in Mind

Kate Motaung2025-04-01T16:10:53+00:00July 8th, 2023|Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured|

There are many reasons why a family might want to make use of counseling for children. A child may have experienced a traumatic event, such as death or divorce in the family; or been a victim of abuse or bullying. Other less serious circumstances can be perceived as traumatic for a child, for example, a move to a new school or another unexpected change. While children may be less equipped to verbalize their feelings than adults, it is important to bear in mind that counseling for children is not all that different from counseling adults. Children are people created in God’s image and sinners in a fallen world. Plano Christian Counseling offers faith-based counseling for children, providing a safe space for them to express their feelings and work through challenges with the support of compassionate Christian counselors. The struggles and desires they face are not unique to those experienced by all people, and their only hope – as with adults – is the hope presented in Jesus Christ. This reality is encouraging when considering biblical counseling for children which can sometimes be deemed inappropriate or inaccessible for younger counselees. The following five principles are good to bear in mind. Involving parents in counseling for children is a priority. Where possible, it is important for parents as the primary caregivers of their children to be involved in the counseling process. In some circumstances, this might not be suitable. For example, if there is an incidence of abuse by a parent or if the relationship between parent and child is strained. It might be that the parents are immature in their faith. But if they are open to bringing their child to a Christian counselor, then it is a great opportunity for the whole family to be exposed to the redeeming [...]

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Resolving Conflict in the Workplace

Resolving Conflict in the Workplace

Kate Motaung2025-04-01T16:53:54+00:00June 16th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Professional Development, Relationship Issues|

The workplace has become a major area of life in the past few decades. Because there is so much time spent at work there will inevitably be conflict in the workplace. Any type of conflict can reduce the workflow and decrease the positive atmosphere. Everyone must know how to resolve conflicts. This will create a healthy work atmosphere for everyone. A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger. – Proverbs 15:1, NASB No matter how big or type of business there will be conflict because there are people present. These conflicts do not have to disrupt the workday. The ability to meet the conflict head-on with resolution will also keep the employees from facing burnout. The best way to resolve conflict is to have leadership that can recognize and address conflict. Plano Christian Counseling offers conflict resolution services for businesses and leaders who want to create a positive, collaborative work environment. Three conflicts and resolutions Since many personalities are working together, the most common conflict in the workplace that occurs revolves around how people interact with people. Some conflicts occur that are more personal. No matter the cause there are ways to successfully resolve any type of conflict. Leadership conflict. This is one of the most common types of conflict. Every manager or leader has an idea about productively leading a team. This idea is not always the same for everyone. When there is a decision that causes conflict within the team, the leader must be able to identify and resolve the issue. Here are a few types of conflicts in this area: Decision-making: These conflicts occur when leaders of different areas disagree on a decision. Goals: A manager who has a goal that doesn’t align with the company may cause a conflict within [...]

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After the Affair: Can Trust Be Restored?

After the Affair: Can Trust Be Restored?

Sandra Stein2025-04-01T17:02:10+00:00May 26th, 2023|Couples Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Infidelity is not an easy thing to heal from. Finding out that that your spouse has cheated on you can be devastating. It’s like receiving a sucker punch to your gut that leaves you reeling in shock and disbelief. Overcoming a breach of trust is one of the most difficult issues for a relationship to survive, but God is a healer of broken hearts, and with His help, it is possible to rebuild trust even after the affair. Plano Christian Counseling offers faith-based counseling for couples navigating the pain of infidelity. Nobody can go back and start a new beginning but anyone can start today and make a new ending. – Maria Robinson What not to do after the affair The initial shock of discovering that a partner has been unfaithful and the flooding emotions are normal. Reactions sparked by this may seem reasonable and justifiable at the moment but will hinder healing and likely lead to regrets later on. Avoid telling everyone about it. Before you impulsively tell everyone what your spouse has done, allow yourself and your partner time to discuss and determine how you want to proceed going forward, what you are going to share, and with whom. Avoid blasting your cheating spouse on social media. Once you put something out on social media it lives forever even if you later decide to delete it. Avoid making life-altering decisions. Acting impulsively while your thinking is clouded, such as filing for divorce or retaliating by having an affair of your own, can make any possibility of healing your relationship more difficult. Take time to think things through before doing anything rash. Avoid obsessing over the person your partner had an affair with. Hyper fixating on the other person, stalking him or her on social media, or allowing [...]

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Loved and Found: The Healing Power that Overcomes Trauma and Shame

Loved and Found: The Healing Power that Overcomes Trauma and Shame

Kate Motaung2025-04-04T03:49:46+00:00May 2nd, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Trauma|

Humans are curious creatures. We are breathing miracles that embody the creative brilliance of the King of the Universe. He isn’t an aloof God, externalized from our infirmities and issues, but rather the one Lord and Father of all, who isn’t far from any of us (Acts 17:27) even in our trauma and shame. That Truth comes alive in and for those who accept the olive branch of The Father’s Offering, in Jesus. As God’s Son and our Savior, Jesus poured His entire life to reconcile us with the Father, receive us into the family, making us righteous–all by faith in Christ. At Plano Christian Counseling, we offer faith-based counseling to help individuals deepen their understanding of God’s truth and experience His healing in every area of life. God’s abundant affection toward us characterizes the miracle of salvation, but our own diminished self-worth causes us to wrestle with giving and receiving a Love this relentless, raw, and real. Our relationship with God, ourselves, and others would ideally be characterized by all the Father initiates and imparts, but the same complications that entered Eden, afflict us, too. When we search outside of God and His expansive provision, we stumble and injure ourselves in search of identity and validation. We scout for attention, affirmation, and affection in the wrong places, though we were already created in and for love by our God who is Love. In response to the Father, we love and learn how to receive and rest in it for ourselves, return it to Him, and release it to others. The pathology of trauma and shame A soul that injures itself operates similarly to an auto-immune deficiency. Many times, when we have been infected by trauma, our hearts and minds behave with the same pattern where dis-ease deconstructs the [...]

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Slow Burn: Releasing Unresolved Anger and the Right to Revenge

Slow Burn: Releasing Unresolved Anger and the Right to Revenge

Kate Motaung2025-04-04T03:58:57+00:00April 29th, 2023|Anger Issues, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Relationship Issues, Spiritual Development|

Anger is a normal emotion. We don’t have to fear it; but like fire, we are to handle it responsibly, with caution, maturity, and a sober mind submitted to the Holy Spirit’s wisdom. We bring it to the Lord. As Helper, He filters what is unnecessary and gives insight and understanding of what to do with what’s left. We may have been legitimately wronged, but allowing unresolved anger in our lives has dire consequences we don’t always see. Cain didn’t know that his brother’s blood would cry out from the earth when he killed Abel. God heard it, though (Genesis 4:10-11). Perhaps, no human witnesses were present to observe the traumatic incidents that sparked our anger and the thirst for revenge. God knows all the details. Always present, our Advocate was fully aware and completely committed to righting the wrongs on our behalf. The Father repurposes evil, turning it for our good and His glory (Romans 8:28). We have to yield God’s sovereign position to Him alone. We don’t have the right or the capacity to occupy His throne and administer short-sighted human justice, restricted by the finite realm of what we know, see, and feel. While our feelings are legitimate, our wounded hearts demonstrate true love when responding to God with trust versus unforgiveness and revenge. He does what we cannot. Love breaks the stronghold that hate seeks to establish in our hearts. At Plano Christian Counseling, we offer faith-based support to help individuals work through pain, release unforgiveness, and experience the freedom that comes with God’s healing love. We may look vulnerable, perhaps even foolish. Some would say that Jesus appeared the same way. Without retribution, He was tortured mercilessly for all of humanity, including those who reject Him as Savior and Lord. His suffering preceded the souls. [...]

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